The following entries (from beginning runner to half marathon finisher) represents a continuing journey of tremendous grief and sorrow, and of transformation - largely through the therapeutic power of running. The sorrow that has broken my heart open wide has in time allowed me to experience the beauty of being in the present moment. And of course, without the support of family and friends to guide me, I would not have made it this far.

If you have lost someone in your life, I offer these words and verse (some Kristy's, some mine and others) with the hope it may touch your heart and help you heal.
mailto:clarksonart@gmail.com


Wednesday, December 10, 2008

PIGEON TOES

When I was a little girl my parents took me to the doctor. They were told I had some type of malformation of the pelvis and for this reason I would walk funny. Back then they used to call it being "pigeon toed". The doctor said they had two choices. I could go to bed every night in a brace or they could do nothing. If they did nothing he said I would probably change it myself when people started noticing. What he really meant was when they started making fun of me.

Well my parents decided not to put me through the trauma of a night brace. Medieval devices really. Your feet are both bound together in a type of "Y" to over compensate for your feet turning in. The brace is so large and heavy I'm glad they decided on this. The result is that I was made fun of for most of my school years. Kids can really be cruel.

When I was an adult people would sometimes tell me I walked funny but it was never as bad as when I was a child. So when I started running it was a little awkward at first. I remember someone actually yelling out their car window at me "Pick your legs up more!" I still feel that when people stare at my legs when I am running that they are of course thinking I run funny. I guess maybe I am but I have finally gotten over it.

I was thinking of this today as I ran my prescribed 10 miles. How far I have come. Learning to accept myself as I am is something I have to remind myself to do constantly. And I just knew I had to tell someone about Pigeon Toes.

Today's workout: 10 miles at easy pace. I completed the run only stopping once for a drink. The second half was easier than the first and my legs felt strong.

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