The following entries (from beginning runner to half marathon finisher) represents a continuing journey of tremendous grief and sorrow, and of transformation - largely through the therapeutic power of running. The sorrow that has broken my heart open wide has in time allowed me to experience the beauty of being in the present moment. And of course, without the support of family and friends to guide me, I would not have made it this far.

If you have lost someone in your life, I offer these words and verse (some Kristy's, some mine and others) with the hope it may touch your heart and help you heal.
mailto:clarksonart@gmail.com


Wednesday, January 7, 2009

OIL OF OLAY




A sweet memory came to me this morning as I was getting ready for the day. Even though Kristy was my youngest I still was rather young when she was born. She had three older siblings! Through the years she became used to people asking if I was her sister. Okay, remember, this was when I was younger!

One day Kristy asked me what type of cream I used on my face. I told her I had only ever used one brand. In my twenties I began using Oil of Olay as it had a pleasant scent and most importantly - it was not expensive! As a single mother in her twenties with 4 children I was not able to spend extra money on anything! I considered this to be a luxury to be sure!

I was remembering this as I put cream on my face this morning. You guessed it - Oil of Olay. Not too long ago I was running at the lake. I just happened upon Tanya who was also running. Tanya was one of Kristy's closest friends. They spent months training in New Zealand together. Some of my most precious photos are of them together in New Zealand. So you can imagine how well they knew each other. Tanya stopped to say hello to me and we hugged. She looked at me with a sad smile and said, "You smell like Kristy - like Oil of Olay!" So I told her the same story. We both shed a tear and hugged some more....

The last part of this story is hardest to tell. Kristy's car had to be towed to our house after she died. When we were finally able to get into Kristy's car a few days later I found her duffel bag. It had all her immediate necessities...Clif bars, some bananas, sun screen, a set of dry clothes, some dried chicken jerky and.......a jar of Oil of Olay.

This little jar is one of my most precious possessions. I can just see Kristy using it. And each time I remember our conversation. Now I remember this conversation with Tanya as well. I only use it on special occasions because it will soon be gone.

I used it this morning.

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