The following entries (from beginning runner to half marathon finisher) represents a continuing journey of tremendous grief and sorrow, and of transformation - largely through the therapeutic power of running. The sorrow that has broken my heart open wide has in time allowed me to experience the beauty of being in the present moment. And of course, without the support of family and friends to guide me, I would not have made it this far.

If you have lost someone in your life, I offer these words and verse (some Kristy's, some mine and others) with the hope it may touch your heart and help you heal.

Thursday, June 11, 2009


Sometime earlier I wrote about how death is seen differently by a mother who has put a child in the ground. I remember also saying I felt "indestructible". When I thought back on this statement I felt it was a little strange and could not quite articulate why I felt this way. When talking about Kristy at her memorial I suddenly just blurted it out. I did not intend to say it. I think this poem explains it better than I...

You have made me indestructible
because with you
I do not end in myself.

Pablo Neruda


  1. When I first started reading this, I sympathized with you for your loss. Now, I have lost my grandmother. Now I know the pain first hand, and I empathize with you. Your blog is beautiful, and touches me deeply.

    Thank you.

  2. I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother. There will be a long road ahead for each of us. What I do know is that the love for your grandmother keeps her alive. I have to keep reminding myself that I would not want Kristy to cry for me if I had been the one to die. I would want her to remember me and how much I loved her. I would want to bring a smile to her face.